Pride & Insecurity

I have a friend who once said he didn't know how he could be so full of pride and so insecure at the same time... That question has stuck with me. I don't know if they still deal with this issue but I'm thinking it's more common than we think... We live in an imperfect world, full of imperfect people... Someone recently told me that we all need inner healing just because of that basic fact... Everyone just has different levels of inner healing that they need based on their life... We are all walking wounded in one way or another and just when we've dealt with one wound there is bound to be another one around the corner that we will have to deal with later... That's just life...

I recently returned from a mini retreat where I felt called away by God to just spend time with Him, to seek Him, to fast and pray and cry out to Him day and night regarding something so close to my heart, and hear His heart about it in an environment where I could do so without interruption... During that time I was speaking to a very wonderful lady who does inner healing ministry and we were discussing old lies of the enemy that I had thought I'd dealt with that were trying to creep back into my head... And she said something that was truly profound to me and helped me understand a lot of where some of my own struggles with pride and insecurity come from and hopefully will help others who deal with the same thing whether you're dealing with it right now or if and when it hits you in the future... And I'm going to put it into my own words because that helps me understand things when I can express it in my own words...

Pride and insecurity go hand in hand. They are like two sides of the same coin. Now we know as believers we exchange our sin for His righteousness, our ashes for beauty, etc... And we are also to no longer be conformed to the ways of the world but be transformed by the renewing of our minds and to take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ... we're supposed to find our identity in who God says we are... we are to not lean on our own understanding but in all our ways acknowledge Him... I believe these all tie together... and none of this is based upon feelings... that's the tricky part. There are times when we might feel it but there are times when all these wonderful things we might not feel and we need to still speak them out in faith.

We were bought at a price, we are cleansed from all unrighteousness, we are the righteousness of God through Christ Jesus... We need to exchange our THOUGHTS for His thoughts. It's a good idea to agree with Someone who is never wrong... right? So, come into agreement with what HE says about you. No matter how or what you feel about yourself. No matter what the enemy or your own mind tells you. You feel unworthy, you feel wrong, you feel undeserving, you don't feel good enough, you don't feel talented enough, pretty enough, strong enough, etc... guess what? You're not any of those things on your own... BUT Who and what does God say you are? When the Father looks at you as a believer He sees His Son. He no longer sees all those things you're insecure about. Exchange your thoughts about yourself for the thoughts God has about you. He calls you worthy because of Jesus. He calls you right, you are in right standing with God because of Jesus, He calls you deserving, good and pleasing. He is not disappointed with you. He calls you talented and He gives you favor!

And when you exalt your own insecure thoughts about yourself above His thoughts of you, you are in pride. The very act of submitting those insecure thoughts about yourself to the thoughts He has about you is where humility is found. When you say Lord I don't feel right, I don't feel worthy, I don't feel a, b, or c about myself and I'm insecure in this area or that area BUT I will lay down my own thoughts about myself and come into agreement and submission to who You say I am and how You see me you're laying aside your pride and your insecurity. No, we're not to think more highly of ourselves than we should... I think people take that scripture to mean sometimes that we need to put ourselves down. That's not it at all! God calls us worthy! He died for us. He loves us. He calls us friend, He calls us righteous. Therefore, we are all those things that He says. Not of our own merit but by His mercy and His grace.

Exchange your thoughts about yourself for God's thoughts about you. Submit your insecurities and wrong thinking of yourself to who He says you are. It's when we exalt our own opinion of ourselves above what God says we are that we not submitting to Him and we are in pride because we are exalting our opinion of ourselves above His. That's pretty prideful. It's not humility to dog ourselves and say we're not this or that. It's pride. It's pride to say God I know you say this and that about me but I don't believe it. I believe I'm not worthy. God calls you worthy. Submit your low opinion of yourself to His truth and His Word. You may not feel it right away. You may still feel insecure. It's a process. But I charge you to get in the Word and look up what He says about you. Who He says you are. And even when you don't feel it. Every day say Lord I'm struggling in this area... whatever it may be and say but I humble myself before you and I lay aside my own thoughts of myself to you and proclaim and speak out what God says about you. A change will come. Find your security in Him alone. Pride is anything that exalts itself above God. Even so called "humble" thoughts about ourselves... that just aren't so humble...

Maybe you're at a low point in your life like I am where I feel the rug has been ripped out from underneath me and my heart is shattered. Maybe like me something deep within you has shattered... exchange it... maybe this example will help...

Lord I feel weak... but You say in my weakness You are strong
Lord I feel defeated... but You say I am more than a conqueror
Lord I feel lost... but You say I am found

Just a few examples, and I have not perfected it. I'm still asking, seeking, knocking, working it out.